Monday, June 25, 2012

Awkward Accounts From My Annual Check-Up: A two day series of a short story

So every year when I have my annual "Lady" check up, I seem to walk away with an awkward/embarassing story. Let's set the quick backdrop. During college, I went to school in Idaho but got all my doctor's visits out of the way when I was in Atlanta while visiting home. Well, after getting back to Idaho after the summer, I got a call that I needed to go back to the lady doctor for a follow up test. Well great. I went ahead and found a doctor off campus just to be sure I wouldnt be running into anyone I knew.
I schedule and arrive at my appointment for 8 am, fill out my forms, awkwardly undress, try to master the half-paper oragami robe they give me and patiently wait for the doctor to show up while I incessantly check that all my lady parts are covered up.
Finally to doc arrives and begins his exam of checking and probing. The conversation begins like this:

Doc: So you're from Georgia huh? I actually just moved from there.
Me: Yup I am... And what a small world, what part did you move from?
Doc: Oh I lived in Lawrenceville... I raised my kids there until all of them were out of the house. My youngest is in college now.
Me: Oh nice, ya I love GA, I actually have family in Lawrenceville too.
Doc: Oh yah where abouts? I lived in Dacula...
Me: That's where my family is, thats funny... yah my family is the "Jenk..." trailing off because it starts to click.....
Doc: Oh Yah!! I know Rob and Bonnie very well!!

Then it hits me.... The sudden piece of knowledge of dread as I begin to put my feet into the ice cold stirrups and look to the ceiling for any type of comfort.

Me: .... thinking... "Dr. E..... Mr.E..." wait..... You're not Bennett's dad.... are you?.... (Please no, Please no)
Doc: ... Well yes I am!! Oh... Lindsay!!... How have you been?! How are Rob and Bonnie?

Yup... I had had a huge crush on his son in middle school, played at his house with his kids, and pretty much knew him since I was a kid.He is close friends with my extended family.

Me: Oh just great!... Clenching my teeth and counting down the seconds for this to be over.Seriously? I thought I did my due diligence in checking. Guess I was wrong.
Doc: Well I'll have to tell everyone I saw you
Me: No, that's really okay...

Finally it was over. I barely remember putting my clothes on. The next thing I know, I left before paying (Got a nice voicemail for that one), was in my car... and driving while saying... "Did that just happen?"

It was awful. I saw his son around campus on a daily basis after that encounter. Naturally. I didnt know how to even look at him. He probably thinks I'm an emo-recluse now. Well Good bye social life and reputation.


End Result:


Presentation1-1 

Just had to share my unfortunate event. And that was last year's tale ... Stay tuned tomorrow for this years!

16 comments:

Bethany Scruggs said...

ohhh mah goshhhhhhhhhh! bahahaaaa! that freakin' sucks! im so glad you shared though! :)

Shalyce said...

GAAAAH!, I just gasped in my office.

Alana Christine said...

OMG! I would have died right there on the table. Seriously so awkward!

Ally said...

Ahhhh! I just died reading that! As if going to the lady doctor wasn't bad enough!

The Management said...

aaahhhh that sucks! aaawwkkward.

Natasha said...

hahaha you poor thing! As if those things aren't awkward and awful enough. that is hilarious.

xoxo Natasha

Wendy said...

TOO FUNNY!!! After finding an English speaking OB in Germany....I bumped into them (husband AND wife both were partners in the same practice) at the pre school. They took their kids to the same pre school my kids went to ....UGH!!!

Sam @ reddyorknot.blogspot.com said...

oh my gosh i am cringing for you! sometimes the world is just too small!

Brooke said...

I'm really sorry, and that sounds so awkward, but I also have to say (and I hope this doesn't offend you), I am seriously cracking up right now. Oh man. So great.

Tyler and Kelly said...

I love Dr. E.... He delivered two of my boys!

Tyler and Kelly said...

I love Dr. E.... He delivered two of my boys!

Lesley @ my lively mind said...

haha, that's hilarious!
hope your follow up test went well though. those are always nerve wracking in itself!

Kelsie @ My Beautiful Life said...

ahh I cringed reading this! Sorry about your awkward encounter

Erin said...

Oh my goshhh I would have absolutely died...!!!!

Katy said...

Oh. My. Word. I would have died.

Kallie said...

bahahahhahahaha! I'm so sorry LB that is ZERO fun! I can't wait to hear about this year.

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