Friday, March 2, 2012

Let Me Tell You...

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Dear Christmas Tree,
You are still embarrassingly hanging out on my back deck. Everyone can see you from the main road. Please just find a big strong man to get rid of you so I don't have to shamefully feel like a redneck every day. I know this is Georgia but c'mon now.

Dear NEW Moleskin Planner,
I am in love with you. You are so cool, come with stickers, and make me feel so deceivingly organized. You make me feel kind of cool every time I write in you.

Dear Little Sister,
This weekend is your last highschool play/musical performance ever. And once again, you have the lead role. You are SO talented and fearless on that stage and I am so proud to be your big sister. Ps... I am SO proud that you are following in my footsteps and going to BYU-Idaho for college!


Dear Pedestrians,
Learn how to freakin not walk in the middle of the road.

Sincerely,
The woman who is about to run you over for 15 points.

Dear Powers That Be,
Please deposit $9 Million dollars into my bank account -Waiting Patiently

Dear Body,
Please stop pretending your an insomniac and waiting until 4:30 am to fall asleep. Also, it would be nice if you started developing and showing off that invisible 6 pack.

Dear Media,
You should be ashamed of yourselves. Stop covering and over exposing who wore what, who's dating who, and what scandal we can get dirt on next. There are SO MANY other good, worthy things in the world to exploit and present. You're one of the very reasons human morals are declining.

Dear Woman Whose Ass is Hanging Out At This Nice Restaurant,
Please... Have some class. No one wants to see your nasty, flabby butt cheeks hanging out of your way too tight hot pink miniskirt. I hope you haven't reproduced because you're one of the contributing reasons women have no class today. Please act your age and start respecting yourself.


Dear Men,
I know it's easy to want an "easy" slutty girl. But please try and expect more out of women and more women will expect more out of themselves. You're better than the world gives you credit for.

Dear Snooki, Lindsay Lohan, Nicki Minaj and other talent-less women in Hollywood,
Grow up, and make something of yourselves.


Dear Readers,
Sorry for the ranting above. But you all are so incredible. Thank you so much for your comments and support. They mean more than you'll ever know.

14 comments:

CottonCandyINK said...

hahahha, love these kind of post. dear men.. dear snooki... GOLDEN ;-)

mrsj said...

Love that your tree is still on your porch! We just ended up having to burn ours in the yard.

Angela said...

Hahaha I love this post! I agree with all of these! :)

Mr. Taylor and his Lady said...

oh gosh, nothing is worse than a lone christmas tree on the front porch. poor thing. once it was just so beautifully decorated and green.
and aren't these little notes so much fun. love it :)
xo TJ

Nessa @{Casa Braaflat} said...

go girl! i easily agree with you.

Lisa Fly Rondo said...

WHAT?! i love nicki minaj! worlds best female rapper haha seriously!

Lindsay said...

I love everything about this post!!

Denise said...

Best Friday Letters ever! haha I agree with you on every single one, especially the $9 mil :)

Kristen@ Joy in the Journey said...

I got a new camera for Christmas too and I love it! I got the D500. Your pictures are so good. I would love to take some photography classes but the nearest one is 1.5 hrs. away and that's a little much for me right now.
I tagged you on my blog tonight- go check it out!

Kristen@ Joy in the Journey said...

I meant D5100;)

Tabitha Mahoney said...

Love your letters, umm my planner did not come with stickers, I'm way jealous.

Tab
my-cliffnotes.blogspot.com

ms.composure said...

stumbled onto your blog and just wanted to leave you a little blog luv! Def enjoyed reading this post!!

http://infinitelifefitness.com
http://mscomposure.blogspot.com

Abbie Lewis said...

Dear Lindsay,

I also assign points to pedestrians/bikers/motorized skooterers. 50 points for homeless man trying to attack car at stoplight.

Love,

Abbie

http://love-eightdaysaweek.blogspot.com

Abbie Lewis said...

Dear Lindsay,

I also assign points to pedestrians/bikers/motorized skooterers. 50 points for homeless man trying to attack car at stoplight.

Love,

Abbie

http://love-eightdaysaweek.blogspot.com

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